Goshdarnit, Fox News Told Karl Rove To Pipe Down Just Like When They Told Me To Stick A Sock In It And So Forth ...

Doggonnit, I can certainly express some sympathies there across this great nation goshdarnit for my fellow Fox News mouthpiece Karl Rove, bein told to stick a sock in it after his head grew three sizes that night cause of how the Democrats stole the election and even my large wighedge kinda deflated on the other screen just as Karl's noggin was blowin up sigh mutationally and since I do so dearly tend to make things all about me ever since my meteoric rise to fames and fortune after bein put on the public by Jomcane the Mavrik durin the 2008 election, notified by my sassy wardrobes and sayins that struck home with my base which is expandin (especially durin this holiday season with those gooey dessert treats and big suppers that we all have as a normal family back home in Frontporch durin the real American Christian holidays that we do together as normal by golly) but anyway, I can feel somewhat remorsefully emotionable there for Karl since we all remember the tragic circumstance of what happened to me durin at the last convention when I myself was told to clam up and pipe down so Chris Christie could get on up there doin the big keynodes insteada me, so I know how Karl feels all big and stupid and wrongfilled with those projections that he did not agree with when we lost yet another one dingdangit right there in his face.

Doggonnit, Debbie Downer Done Gone And Got Me All Disappointy And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha I for one across this great nation in the traditions of our foundin fathers and in support of our troops and things goin on there throughout our wonderful land am glad and sad at the same time that the obviously rigged election have shocked my shells also and that they turned out the way that they did since I can now guaranteeably continue to appear on the video opinion news programs with Greta and Sean to speechrope and textbleat and remain so dearly beloved by my expandin base which is showin some signs of wear and tear which I offset by my large hairhoppins and high definitioned facepaints in front of the television cameras and as I have kept employed since the days when I decided to go rogue after unhitchin my wagonwheels from Jomcane the Mavrik and the blockhead Joe the Plumber who did not do so well nor did he invite me up there to do my speechreadins for him like at the RNC convention where they served me a shutup sandwich platter there, also too not askin me to inject my blabfragments into the speechthrusts and instead put their money and keynode speech onto that party jumper Chris Christie who shares the blamebulk of our disappointin outcomes that we worked so hard to smacktalk down hashtaggit, all to no avails doggonnit and furthersome, this Wheel of Fortune Blame Wheel keeps comin up bankrupt across this great nation youbetcha as we try to uphold up our patriotic traditions in the footsteps of our forefathers which were shockinly and dissapointinly erased, as the great dinosaurs were because we overfished them which led to their eventual distiction from what I remember from my studyin when I went to colleges back before I got to be the GOP co-star with Jomcane the Mavrik and all the lights and cameras plus that blockhead Joe The Plumber who apparently did not advance with his political apparitions like I did once I patented and bewigged myself into the wardrobed and spitshined celebritory political spokesspeaker that I have dimpled and winked into after goin rogue and bustin out of the GOP scriptstable to enhance my star powers and widen my expandin base where I tooted out some of my best facebookin smacktalks ever (LOutLOL) that is the best way to avoid that lamestream Katie Couric media gotcha style that tripped me up the talksteps that last time I gave the unfair and unbalanced grillins and had the gotcha boot clamped to my mouthrims and jawhinges but anyway it's obviously the fault of Brak Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama winnin this election that is directly to blame for our second loss in a row and I should know doggonnit since I was there at the hub of it during those times in our wonderful histories.

Zing! Went The Zingers From My Mouth And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha for the life of me across this great nation, when I was told Mitt Romney there was gonna use some zingers, (and I must say that among the Mary-add of things that I don't understand at all) I don't understand at all why his campaign crews didn't contact me about zinger stylins since I have left many trails behind me of zingers for more years than I care to remember since my facepalmified attempt with Jomcane the Mavrik and the blockhead Joe the Plumber failingly failed to take over the Senates and White House even though I did rehearse up so many zingers in my head and made them brayably along our wonderful countrysides with the amber grains of waves that I see with my own eyeholes from inside my One Notion bus when I manage to cram out my busy schedule of goin and doin the Fox answer-and-answer sessions where, again, my zingers are respected and laughed over plus the text-shines I get from Sean or Greta, with my expandin base draggin right behind me backin me up there in real America's face, however also, the stigmatosis of bein handed a big box of shutup and treated like Pariah Carey by Chris Christie at the RNC Committee Convention still follows me around like a bad fish doggonnit, I guess I’ll watch from my snidelines to get my thumbs ready to push in how Romney won like when I won mine verses Joe O’Biden.

And The Enmity Award Goes To And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha if I had four thumbs across this great nation I would use all of them at once to downlike this incredibly uh mimical and disrespectish portrayance that Julieanne Tyler Moore acted out against me and my expandin base doggonit some time ago much to the hilaracy and unpatriotic values which are unupholstered on the facebooks that I have come to revenge my enemies with when not powdered up for my appearances on the Greta or Hannity newsblast chatseats where I do my smacktalkin and tartbarbarisms about everyone else with my paybacks and dishouts, plus also various things that I textabout these days with my thumbs since I have so much spare times on my hands (and again, thumbs) which I would reuse to tell those Hollywood radicals out there to take a hitch-hike away from our great country with its hills and high valleys and planes and boats and trains and dunes insteada these funpokins at real life characters like myself with the mimes and mimicons of me which have gardnered those awards on my behalf when they didn't even ask me to be a part of it hashtaggit, and just go pack up and move to Russia where I never said I could see it from my house but that other one sittin there, Tina Fey said it with her awards probably too comin to mock me in the face later on, or tape delayed I think they call it and plus also too hashtaggit, youbetcha I coulda won a buncha those Enmity Awards across this great nation at the big Hollywood pileup against me if I was invited to it (all expenses paid and so forth plus gas) which I was not doggonnit just like with the RNC at Florida excludin me out if you remember cause they told me and my expandin base to clam up and then later Fox News told me to button my lipstick cause Paul Ryan now is a new replacement to me, takin over my speechtexted jawbleats and then givin the big fat keynode to Chris Christie this year, opposite day from the last time when I was centersquared and also Jomcane the Mavrik plus the blockhead Joe The Plumber but I don't know who coulda poorplayed him, maybe Bruce Willis, or that meathead from Archie Bunkers, since I, again, did not watch how she did me in as an actress with her stunninly accurate wardrobes and wigfaces that I saw when her mockmimes misdirected all my attentions away from me, but at least she didn't make me look fat which is what they told me about the camera addin extra chin cans which is why we have to watch our edibles durin this campaign holiday season because of all the waste lines and gooey dessert candydated sweets even though this performance did leave a sour taste there but I am not bitter or sourpussed in the lease about the whole production.

Horsefeathers Goshdarnit Cause Youbetcha I Preheated My Goose When My Hot Saucy Words Were Prepared Too Early For Mitt's Spicy Blandishments Whatever They Are And So Forth ...

Doggonit, it seems like only yesterday youbetcha, that Fox News let me get back on out there with my expandin base and uh say some wordstreams again after tellin me to clam up and take a pipedown around the time of the convention that I was not given welcome mats to from the last time with Jomcane the Mavrik and inelegantly, which is a wordphrase that I can't get unstuck upside my head, invented by our eternal candidate Mitt who I had not overly endorsed and then was not allowed to speechly do so at the convention that I uh was also banned from, with the various barricades and cones placed across this great nation in front of the One Notion bus when I did try and enter the staged door of that patriotic banquet and convention hall to be gained egrets to which I was unable to do so, when just the other day I said the new text real cute-like that "Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama's goose is cooked" (LOutLOL) and that got a good reception Greta or Sean when I quoted it, but now the bird seems to be in the other foot as those precious forefeathers seem to have also gotten plucked into the uh political broths that are simmered up into our great land which he will have to re-gander to get a good view as to what he said to alter the flavor of what he will say that he cooked up.

How Ya Gonna Keep 'Em Down On The White House After They've Grown A Big Stick And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, I'm just so deeply saddened youbetcha that this tragically timely event for me arose right in the nick of time there in Libya (where the sad event took place so I could make my sad but snappy jokes about it across this great nation just in time but to also be seriously remorsed as long as I got my digs in) for me to rigidly get back on up there and tweet off my wisecrackins and disrespectables and so forth and tell Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama to grow a big stick like he's some pal o' mine or a guy in a locker room there (to retext a popularly long-reachin phrase from when one of our former presidents said that stuff about gettin a hold of your chicken and havin it be put into everybody's pots), so immediately I shot over to my facebooks which is my best media and easy to grab a hold of (even in the dark and in the middle of the night plus I can always find it), also in so doin I hoped to get it back up quickly (my popularity) from where it once stood erect but lately had slowly drooped down from the peak and shrunk back when the convention folks and Fox News told me that I was no longer a new wrinkle so I should just let it go and drop it, so there they left me danglin there, as if I could just go limp all of a sudden like a sad dog who lost his big bone, but at the same time also I wanted to stick up for the boner that the lamestream media said Mitt Romney pulled out but anyway, havin those top secret briefs under there near my disposals to textover, I was able to comment from the sometimes scanty details that we have to work with to quippoutingly contact my followers because when they finally told me again and again and again this mornin what I should shoot out there in the way of a reaction, once I stiffly rose up (even though it was one of those gloomy days where the sun don't shine) I shoved myself right back in there to the place where I can again talk about these prickly issues and not keep it zipped up as we constantly apply pressure and friction on our opponent since it looks like a tight election until our decisions are finally released in November as long as we don't blow it and have another mess to clean up until the next one rears its ugly head.

Doggonit, I'll Get By Till The Clouds Roll By, Smile -- Lose That Long Face -- Sail Away, I Don't Care -- I Could Go On Singing When My Sugar Walks Down The Street Some Of These Days If I Only Had A Brain After You've Gone Over The Rainbow -- Be A Clown, Get Happy, Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas On The Atchison Topeka And The Santa Fe And So Forth ...

Doggonit, that's whatcha gotta do youbetcha to pick yourself off, dust yourself up when the lamestream chips get you down and out across this great nation in the footsteps of our forefathers like the other day when Fox News texted me to lipstick it back on home throughout our patriotic country so insteada doing that I took to my facebooks and typed out my revengable displeasurated tweetblurts and also too when the convention folks there in charge of bookin the current speech majorettes for the Florida RNC get-together with the party platforms and issues and signs and hats that I used to be winkably present for up there as the star of that doggone showcase with Jomcane the Mavrik and that interstellar blockhead Joe The Plumber told me to go and tell-my-story-walkin-sister and clam up Chatty-Lou-Hoo what did I do insteada goin home via the One Notion bus in order to keep my expandin base big you may ask goshdarnit and thanks for askin because what I did was is I kept a big frozen baked Alaska smile on my face there and with my high starched wardrobes and my hair piled high upon my head I clang clang clanged along in the face of those lamestream media negative trolleycar trainwreck reports of my demisins which are greatly examinated throughout our magnificent amber wanes of graves.

Those Boneheaded Things Get Me Right In The Bread Basket When My Funny Bone Gets A Brain Freeze And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, it's about time our medically knowledged politicians across this great nation took a stand for those things throughout our wonderful and amber wavin nation that we enjoy and behold close to our grains and other organs that they speak at with those controversial issues such as having offsprings and whether or not they should be harshly debated within our nether-bordered regions of public lands and private areas because when it comes to extended grandkids and sleepover type relatives, whatever things that Mr. King said about them that I will text up are what we should be upholdin and I am very agreeable to them, as we drive toward November with our countdown candidate Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan also too with their support from women because those direct actions that we womenfolk should be doin in the forefathers footsteps to help them (and even the foremothers too who are sometimes in those backgrounds makin soaps and other crude cosmetics or sewin a flag for us to fly and seekin office sometimes and then goin on to become celebrities such as I have done except recently when I was basically told by Fox News and the convention to go home and make them a shut-up sandwich and to can it, which is another fine craft that us ladies do when the harvest comes a comin) reach their achievables to take the continent back from the radicals out there who act just like big babies with unpleasant droolables.

I Yam Agog-gug-gog-gug-gog-gug-gog At What He Says Whensk He Says That He Yis What He Yis And That's All That I Yam Sayin That He Says When He Says That He Yis What He Yis When He Says That That Is What He Yis Which Is What I Yam Yammin To Yous And So Forth ...

Doggonnit, what I forgot to say since bein told to clam up for the convention but I'm over it youbetcha and when Fox News told me to put a sock into it but I'm over it (that) now plus, is that I memorized about when our obvious nominee mimictated the Popeye animated character due to the fact that he has been accused of not havin any fluid motions and movements as scene on TV except for his shiftin positions (LOutLOL) since they are drawn new all the times there with the guidance of those two knobs, attached to the red Etch-A-Sketch window which are then apparently turned upside down (as I am not familiar with usin things with all of my hands and four fingers at once) like the erasable convention parts that I didn't watch with those patriotic platforms and the lights and grandpa's empty chair and color slide backgrounds just like I have rear projected on the hindparts of my home studio that they built before my star had flatscreened upon me goshdarnit just cause I kept stickin my bottom lip out about not gettin my way over the many months and famous years when I have been so dearly welcomed into the numerous bountified rivers, streams, and ear canals across this great nation and beamed into real American televisions and through the handholdable devices throughout our wonderful country that we put our thumbs into also.