Goshdarnit, Fox News Told Karl Rove To Pipe Down Just Like When They Told Me To Stick A Sock In It And So Forth ...

Doggonnit, I can certainly express some sympathies there across this great nation goshdarnit for my fellow Fox News mouthpiece Karl Rove, bein told to stick a sock in it after his head grew three sizes that night cause of how the Democrats stole the election and even my large wighedge kinda deflated on the other screen just as Karl's noggin was blowin up sigh mutationally and since I do so dearly tend to make things all about me ever since my meteoric rise to fames and fortune after bein put on the public by Jomcane the Mavrik durin the 2008 election, notified by my sassy wardrobes and sayins that struck home with my base which is expandin (especially durin this holiday season with those gooey dessert treats and big suppers that we all have as a normal family back home in Frontporch durin the real American Christian holidays that we do together as normal by golly) but anyway, I can feel somewhat remorsefully emotionable there for Karl since we all remember the tragic circumstance of what happened to me durin at the last convention when I myself was told to clam up and pipe down so Chris Christie could get on up there doin the big keynodes insteada me, so I know how Karl feels all big and stupid and wrongfilled with those projections that he did not agree with when we lost yet another one dingdangit right there in his face.

Doggonnit, Debbie Downer Done Gone And Got Me All Disappointy And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha I for one across this great nation in the traditions of our foundin fathers and in support of our troops and things goin on there throughout our wonderful land am glad and sad at the same time that the obviously rigged election have shocked my shells also and that they turned out the way that they did since I can now guaranteeably continue to appear on the video opinion news programs with Greta and Sean to speechrope and textbleat and remain so dearly beloved by my expandin base which is showin some signs of wear and tear which I offset by my large hairhoppins and high definitioned facepaints in front of the television cameras and as I have kept employed since the days when I decided to go rogue after unhitchin my wagonwheels from Jomcane the Mavrik and the blockhead Joe the Plumber who did not do so well nor did he invite me up there to do my speechreadins for him like at the RNC convention where they served me a shutup sandwich platter there, also too not askin me to inject my blabfragments into the speechthrusts and instead put their money and keynode speech onto that party jumper Chris Christie who shares the blamebulk of our disappointin outcomes that we worked so hard to smacktalk down hashtaggit, all to no avails doggonnit and furthersome, this Wheel of Fortune Blame Wheel keeps comin up bankrupt across this great nation youbetcha as we try to uphold up our patriotic traditions in the footsteps of our forefathers which were shockinly and dissapointinly erased, as the great dinosaurs were because we overfished them which led to their eventual distiction from what I remember from my studyin when I went to colleges back before I got to be the GOP co-star with Jomcane the Mavrik and all the lights and cameras plus that blockhead Joe The Plumber who apparently did not advance with his political apparitions like I did once I patented and bewigged myself into the wardrobed and spitshined celebritory political spokesspeaker that I have dimpled and winked into after goin rogue and bustin out of the GOP scriptstable to enhance my star powers and widen my expandin base where I tooted out some of my best facebookin smacktalks ever (LOutLOL) that is the best way to avoid that lamestream Katie Couric media gotcha style that tripped me up the talksteps that last time I gave the unfair and unbalanced grillins and had the gotcha boot clamped to my mouthrims and jawhinges but anyway it's obviously the fault of Brak Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama winnin this election that is directly to blame for our second loss in a row and I should know doggonnit since I was there at the hub of it during those times in our wonderful histories.

Zing! Went The Zingers From My Mouth And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha for the life of me across this great nation, when I was told Mitt Romney there was gonna use some zingers, (and I must say that among the Mary-add of things that I don't understand at all) I don't understand at all why his campaign crews didn't contact me about zinger stylins since I have left many trails behind me of zingers for more years than I care to remember since my facepalmified attempt with Jomcane the Mavrik and the blockhead Joe the Plumber failingly failed to take over the Senates and White House even though I did rehearse up so many zingers in my head and made them brayably along our wonderful countrysides with the amber grains of waves that I see with my own eyeholes from inside my One Notion bus when I manage to cram out my busy schedule of goin and doin the Fox answer-and-answer sessions where, again, my zingers are respected and laughed over plus the text-shines I get from Sean or Greta, with my expandin base draggin right behind me backin me up there in real America's face, however also, the stigmatosis of bein handed a big box of shutup and treated like Pariah Carey by Chris Christie at the RNC Committee Convention still follows me around like a bad fish doggonnit, I guess I’ll watch from my snidelines to get my thumbs ready to push in how Romney won like when I won mine verses Joe O’Biden.

And The Enmity Award Goes To And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha if I had four thumbs across this great nation I would use all of them at once to downlike this incredibly uh mimical and disrespectish portrayance that Julieanne Tyler Moore acted out against me and my expandin base doggonit some time ago much to the hilaracy and unpatriotic values which are unupholstered on the facebooks that I have come to revenge my enemies with when not powdered up for my appearances on the Greta or Hannity newsblast chatseats where I do my smacktalkin and tartbarbarisms about everyone else with my paybacks and dishouts, plus also various things that I textabout these days with my thumbs since I have so much spare times on my hands (and again, thumbs) which I would reuse to tell those Hollywood radicals out there to take a hitch-hike away from our great country with its hills and high valleys and planes and boats and trains and dunes insteada these funpokins at real life characters like myself with the mimes and mimicons of me which have gardnered those awards on my behalf when they didn't even ask me to be a part of it hashtaggit, and just go pack up and move to Russia where I never said I could see it from my house but that other one sittin there, Tina Fey said it with her awards probably too comin to mock me in the face later on, or tape delayed I think they call it and plus also too hashtaggit, youbetcha I coulda won a buncha those Enmity Awards across this great nation at the big Hollywood pileup against me if I was invited to it (all expenses paid and so forth plus gas) which I was not doggonnit just like with the RNC at Florida excludin me out if you remember cause they told me and my expandin base to clam up and then later Fox News told me to button my lipstick cause Paul Ryan now is a new replacement to me, takin over my speechtexted jawbleats and then givin the big fat keynode to Chris Christie this year, opposite day from the last time when I was centersquared and also Jomcane the Mavrik plus the blockhead Joe The Plumber but I don't know who coulda poorplayed him, maybe Bruce Willis, or that meathead from Archie Bunkers, since I, again, did not watch how she did me in as an actress with her stunninly accurate wardrobes and wigfaces that I saw when her mockmimes misdirected all my attentions away from me, but at least she didn't make me look fat which is what they told me about the camera addin extra chin cans which is why we have to watch our edibles durin this campaign holiday season because of all the waste lines and gooey dessert candydated sweets even though this performance did leave a sour taste there but I am not bitter or sourpussed in the lease about the whole production.

Doggonit, Mitt Romney's Hell Week Was Like A Sharp Lamestream Newspaper Stick In The Eye And So Forth ...

Doggonit, youbetcha we're not freakin out as the lamestream media says across this great nation with their lamestream Royal Jelly Queen Elizabeth Katie Couric sittin up there on her lamestream thrown with her lamestream crown of jewels and her septic made from old breakfast newspapers that I don’t read just because a few of the GOP leaders who matter anymore have uh seethingly become jumpshippable and distanced their closenessity to Mitt Romney, with Chris Christie first doin a doublewide turnaround from those controversial percentables that Mittney said in his ambush movie role he fundraised in, plus Scott Brown over in Matchasucretts also did pull away from the um $50,000 a plate chewables that Luke Warmney did say, however to back up what Ritt Marmee is now sayin fluidly, which mirrorize our majesticable and dry riverbeds with soarin valleys that we see throughout this wonderful bus on my One Notion tour Greta or Sean, I do have Supreme lipstick that we will stop in the name of Mitt and we won't go straight to hell if by followin the train that Matt Rumney conducts for us as he pitbulls his campaign straight to such a, how shall I wordsay it, uh unique fashion statement which I would have gone on about at the convention if Chris Christie hadda given me some elbows room to hockeymom my textables but as we all know and love, I was traffic-coned out in the rain from the conventional centers in Florida.

Goshdarnit, Infantile Sarahlysis Strikes Again And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, try as I might across this great nation to steal the attentionable limelights away from Luke Warmney by facebookin that thing they put in front of me wisecrackin about Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama growin a big stick phrased up in my own style by one of my parroteers which they have pat down, with how I do my "get-evens" in the past with my hilarious angerjabs and barbtauntables that got me all the applauses and laffs a few years back when at the convention I was invited to with Jomcane the Mavarik, insteada this time around when I was told to "dont' call us, we'll call Chris Christie, you" and shut your trap and pipe down, I was kind hopin youbetcha that this would make my values get up again for my speakrousin fees while on my One Notion bus tours which was runnin low on the gas till I dipped my yapper there into the well of infomations that are searchable for me to textably go there down to those heights of what I have left doggonit, since I got scabs of time over here now and also too Fox News told me to stick a sock in it more often but I still am amusable for my many thousands of patriotic real Americans which do so dearly patriot my expandin base which was gettin wider and wider until I got more active again by standing up and showing my own big stick stump speech.

Sayin The Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama Poll Bump Up Was A Sugar High Is A Rather Insulint Comment That Sugar Coats The Bitter And Sour Job Numbers And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, youbetcha that sugar high remark is rather insulint for the Ryan and Romney campaigns to make in light of their less than Splendad convention pollbounces with recent rather dull and saccharine speeches which I was clammed up for and shut outa and boyhowdy they woulda gotten better ratins perhaps if I hadn't been pushed off the stage by Chris Christie with his big Sweet 'N Low keynode up there kickin sand in my face like a big comic book bully where I was gonna do the talkin or so I was led to believe across this Equal great nation by all the voices As Part A Me pointin in that direction and tellin me in my head that I would be able to bring out the springboards and platforms with the snappy phrasefragments and audience sweeteners that I was famously packaged, painted and dimpled up for that last time with JomCane and Joe the Plumber when the Mavrik and I barnstormed across the country puttin the fear o' Fox into everyone because of the dangerous radical anti real American foreign strange not good unlikeable harsh socialistical terroristic scary angry overseas alien exotic imported unnatural controversial hazardous flag-threatenin worriable afraid-makin terrible awful bad patriotically unhealthy things that we have had our governmen turn into since Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama's sugar coatin of our sour employment numbers and bitter moods we're all in for.

Youbetcha I Thought I'd Be Sayin Dots Vidalia To The Russia Issue, But Here We Go With Paul Ryan Tryin And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, since I am an expert tease about Russia and their so-be-it-union or whatever, I must speak up unlike at the convention where I was told to clam up, so anyways there goes the lamestream media, throned up by its queen, Miss Katie Couric youbetcha, still askin those horrible answers and now gettin her lamestream friends to ask their journlistic gotchables to Paul Ryan trying to explain what Rom Mittney said and obviously still gettin back at me since this is still all about me throughout our great land with its traditions of my free speeches because now my words per minute talkin fee bottomed out even with my sizeable expandin base there, tryin to make Ryan's hope go down the real American drains across our great land, anaconda one microsceptic thing I frontporched about Russia way back when with Jomcane the Mavrik and that inernational lughead Joe the Plumber and also too because of that Katie Cohort's friend Tina Fey with her cruel ventrologist act starrin me when by this time and after all I spoke for them on the Fox Hours to shut me down and out from from the convention like some dummy thank you very much Chris Christie just because you kept your big job the whole way through and I rogued out to become a more famous end ditty than you, I patriotically thought I woulda been sayin dots vidalia to that whole Russue but even if I begged and got down on my knee yet, it still is there doggonit.

The Stings And Arrows Of The Political Game Are Like Targets Archedly Slung Toward Their Targets And So Forth ...

Doggonit, I think it's not right youbetcha to downmouth your political enemies and hatredables with such tarfeathery type comments across this great nation the way that the radical democrat folks on the either side of the isle got up and did to our ultimate nominee goshdarnit, which is somethin I didn't get the chance to do throughout this wonderful land since bein bumped off the Christieplatform and stages that I was once so audiencely welcomed up with, with my tartbarbery plus snappy sayins gettin all those laughs and attentions on me that one time with Jomcane the Mavrik and that incredibly outspokened blunderbust Joe the Plumber with his angry questions hilariously disrespectin Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama in his face (LOutLOL) about his plumbin store which was a tomfibbery but that's bedside the points there because it was so much fun to be all in his face and streetsmart and whatnot but anyhow since I didn't get to say nuthin, also plus too when Fox News told me to clampett granny, I was so distressable that I took to my Tweetbed and my facebookins staff to explode my displeasurables at the texts I've read from what real Americans said about those horribly and unprofessionally done things said against Mitt Ryan, who I spoke about also but much more blandularly when it was allowable for me to go on and on about those relevant things long ago insteada bein a good sport and supportin him which I didn't do, much to my shagrins since the convention folks slipped me one of those Everlastin Gobstoppers to stop up my everlastin and once unstoppable gob.

To Be As Seen On TV Or Not To Be As Seen On TV And Could You Repeat The Question And So Forth ...

Youbetcha, I kinda gotta admit it was hard goshdarnit for some of us to hear the so-called keynode speech this time from way far away from the welcomin "WELCOME" mats of the convention there, through the insulated and vinyl-wrapped cold aluminum shell of the One Notion Bus, usin that remarkable earpiece slash hearin-aid gizmo as seen on TV on the infoprogram (shown right after that informative Victoria Principle skin tighten-up-your-frowny-face commercial with the creams and various ointments across this great nation), but from what I was able to gardner through background grunts and seat-shiftins, full-time Governor Chris did a pretty good jab up there of ungently gettin the message applied and spread all over, instead of me expandin my own sizeable base, sayin those things that I wouda should coulda saida but I was told that my services would not be necessary and insteada me they went for the so-called "bully-puppet" that I learned about through several textmails and those historical browser research "point and click" support group sessions which I go to regular since bein given the heave-ho this year from the speechperch where I once put my mighty platforms on with Jomcain the Mavrik and Joe the Plumber, although I am unresentfilled and not sadly emoticoned about it doggonit, even if the lamestream media there once again says I am or even if Katie Couric's behind a bush or bus barricade just waitin to pounce again.

I'm Laffin On The Outside, Spyin On The Inside Cause I Can't Get Inside And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit youbetcha it must be fun to be one of the insider people this time, invited to be inside the convention I mean, insteada lurkin outside in the rain from a big One Notion Bus like this year since they ran out of space for speaktalkin once Chris Christie took over the area that I and millions of others assumed I would be takin up like the last time over there, all shined up and strapped in with the Mavrik Jomcain and Joe The Plumber but now I just feel so drained since bein told to pipe down and plus also I'd have to wear a funnier nose and mustache glasses to snake past the bouncers because from what my sore says are textin me from their advantage points near the barbwire, there's a picture of me with a "DO NOT ADMIT HER IN" sticker slapped on it, pasted right across the mouth as things are gettin goin, with Mitt there talkin about all his negative and quite frankly, awful and terrible setbacks plus weak campaign slumps to sound like they were Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama's fault which is how I remember us doin the blamey game when I used to get told those notes and rules before I was left in the lurch of my past sparkly glories, the dry dust of forgotten words and phrasemakins kicked up into my eye by the heels of our great forefathers and treated like that singer Pariah Carey Nation doggonnit, because they're afraid I'll go all rogue and bust up the place with an axe or some media grabbin poutlights or a Mister Miss Microphone to take away from the relevant talks that are scheduled then.

It Is Scientificially Bad Science That I Will Not Be Able To Release My Cattylist Of Unstable Elements Into The Mixture At The Convention's Compound To Get A Reaction And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, as I spy with my binacascope at the closed gates of the convention, where some of us can't scientifically get into there to speak edgewise, since certain fullterm Governors muscled over my spot in the lights that we used to absorb as enjoyables with wardrobe extras and lipsticked-stained comments of yesteryears gone by with Jomcain the Mavrik and Joe the Plumber, from our republicratic nation from the One Notion bus I sit across this great landscape, as you people who were invited (thanks alot after whatall I've done for you all) to brace for the comin Hurricane Whatever, to reince the convention hall with freedom's fluidy liquids as we march two by two into the auditoriark to hoist ourselves up onto the reinforced podiums to get our message on out to the real American elements, I can only think back dogonnit to what I am texted to remember youbetcha of my colleges days studyin those mock-sciences and "senior level" things there that we put off until the last part of those semesters, crammin allnighters in those cool evenins before these false threats of global warmin were gored into us matadorically, like radical heatbombs, learnin the foreign Derwoodian theory of electrocution, knowin full well and so forth that these things must be debunked even if we lived in single dormitory rooms with only one floor-level bed for the future of our party's spines and support systems which we cherish as we sit at the convention tables periodically.

I'm Just Sayin But I'm Not Sayin Mitt Romney There Says There's A Gag Order There On What You Can't And Can't Ask About This Whole Akin Paul Ryan Mess And So Forth ...

Dogonnit, youbetcha even I coulda handled this goshdarn lamestream media thing better if they had only let me do my convention distraction speechtalkin with my cracked team of investigationist reporters and tweeters and facebookers and presshandlers and internetters and webstirrers and cosmetologers and wardrobe mistressers and hairdressers and cobblers and skintoners and necktighteners and chinstrappers and earwhisperers and trendhoppers and chartstackers and slangslingers and factgrabbers and quotepullers and lintcheckers and busdrivers and nailpolishers and bootshiners and eyebrowpencilers and madhatters and icemakers and moisturizers and feesetters and family members but I have been sadly and most face-slappinly disembarred and elbowed out by other full time Governor keyspeakers from the entire boundary and convention “per amateur” property lines and media blackout holdin pens that will be takin place and heavily armed for the hurricane across this proud nation down there around the Tampa Basin area so I was thinkin about doin one of those flyovers that were so popular durin the Katrina, when George Bush looked down and out, out down the window there with a serious concernicon plus serious jawfrowns for the future of our party’s own two feet, arms and legacies as well as our nation’s national interests because the Romney Ryan’s hope situation seems to be a high pressure system which is full of ironing because hurricanes are very low in those pressure areas as I have been informed by the barameters that measure them.

What's So Big About Skinny Dippin In The Sea of Galilee When I Have Been Stripped Bare And Thrown To The Undertows Without A Speech To Spoke In And So Forth ...

Doggonnit, these naked admissions of our GOPeers going for a drinkfilled swim in Israeli areas over there pail in comparison of me and my submergable troubles when it comes to the upcomin GOP Convention youbetcha, since I have been stripped bare and also thrown into the cold water of silence and Christie-creamed so as to NOT have sharable spokespoints across this great nation, seriously hamstrung which turns my quest to follow in the forefathers' footsteps like I always say I do, into some type of grotesque plus high-heeled American crawl across our wonderful country, which is a goshdarn shame, since I thought I was gonna have a cakewalk and hobble together some excellent zingers and honest to goodness snappy sayins (this time around with 50% more snappy) aimed at those policies that the radical Washington establishin elements over there have decided to backstroke to us real Americans as we cherish those coverings of parchment that preserve our heritages and our dignity not only in overseas waters, but also the oceans of the Potomac, where George Washington once and fully clothed, stood in a crossed boat, scotchguarded by the equally dressed Paul Revere and his silver horse ridin through other above-sea-level towns and valleys where he said famously, one if dry land, two if by seas which I believe is the skinny on that, as we dip into the November event to buoy up our Ryan's hope and Romney team, swimmin those laps to get the gold and take it back without apologizin with our pants down and so forth.

Y'All Come Back Now But Not Here To Hear Me And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, here and now one of our Tea Party men across this great nation is bein hound-hammered dogonnit for drawlin his vocal stylins a little toward the audience that he was speechtalkin with which is necessary because I have done so with my many talkblasts throughout this wonderful nation when disembussing from my One Notion Sarah's Ark and find myself faced with different lookin faces across real America that demand that I speak at them except of course at the Republican Convention this time where y'all told me to get back on the bus and where did you ride in from type comments so just keep rollin Sister and the Rafalca you rode in on, but that's another story for me to go on and on about later with the way Chris Christie gobbled up my timeslot, however when the fine young Josh Mandelbrought some down-home pickins and grinnins to his speech there reminds me of when I was doin a thing down along the Mensa Company where I was there on a pass and found myself usin big ole words such as "research" and "verify" and was faced with variously strange tongues and factcheckin methods which weakened my thumbs fiddle-dee-dee for the facebookin and tweeterin method I have become integrated with when adoptin those accents and regionalismatic countrytime vapors and hayseed twangins and also when Noreasterly with the famous Connecticut-jaw accent adapters when pronouncin several words up there such as "top drawerrrrrr."

Youbetcha I Am Shocked That Joe O'Biden Charged Those Racially Credited Remarks On Accounts Revolvin Over All Real Americans And So Forth ...

Well dogonnit, I had to say somethin real fast there edgewords in reply to these things, since I was shut up from the convention this time around goshdarnit and squished down by Chris Christie youbetcha across this wonderful country, plus also too I happen to have expertease advice on exactly what things "drag down a ticket," back then that one time with Jomcain, pardon me, Senator Mavrik, back then at the 2008 McCain, when I was first notable with the selected wardrobes and face-firmin technologies and snappy "YouTube-level" comeback commentary insults that anchored me Bambily across the country toward my expandin base which has been fannin out there and gettin wider durin the past few years across the ungirdled fields and amber planes of waves throughout our national landscapes that I look down upon from my One Notion Sarah's Ark Bus durin my roadshows and covered plate dinner speeches that I am invited to and so graciously and humbly charge nominably for my time and talons when it comes to important political and patriotic-type subjects in the shadowed footsteps and pointed values of our forefathers' forefingers which Joe O'Biden is painfully unaware of and sticks in the very eye of history, with his hurtful and shockin comments which wounded me deeply because of my well-known dedications to these sensitive racial issues across those areas affectin those people.

Goshdarnit Honey, These Radical Campaigns Full Of Stings And Arrows Just Can't Beehive And So Forth ...

Goshdarnit, if I've heard it once across this great nation from up in Alaska mostly, I've heard it a thousand times then youbetcha, all about the "I know you are but what am I" campaign strategy that we get told to us by the powders that be, dustin off those types of schoolyard taunts and jeerjabs that we must aim at our opponents, and then run away so that they cannot run away with their radical agendas and recipies for socialist just desserts, which is by golly what we deserve and will leave such bad tastes in our patriotic and traditionally upheld mouths if we let the Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama camp and their bakeries sell these things that our new Ryan's Hope and Romney are tryin to take back throughout this countryside, includin the purple majesty mountains and fruits sweepin down the hill like in that Oklahoman musical about Oklahoma called "Oklahoma" that many real Americans do so enjoy tappin their American values toes to, keepin these traditions and wavin heels of amber that we see from our One Notion Sarah's Ark alive, as we speed by these dots on the map and also the malls, spreadin seeds and patriotic pollen, like pridefull bees, swarmin in the truth throughout this historical country as we drive into November to find the safety of the convention hive which I am not the queen bee of this season, or at least that's the buzz I hear about it with Chris Christie now takin up all the air and airtime which at first stung me somewhat when I heard it through the grapevine because last year I was swelled with pride but now that's gone down.

Har Har Har Dee Har Har Bang Zoom Pow Right In The Kisser And So Forth ...

Dogonnit youbetcha, all the speechtalkin slots seem to be all given away to those members except me who "stuck with" the GOP there, like Chris Christie who I guess got the speakinspot that I was sposta get after I up and quit that job of President of Alaska to seek brighter famelights, even though many of my hardcores do remember, I did hold many places with Jomcain the Mavrik, with the fondly remembered wardrobe budgets and attention-catchin lipstick laugh lines all over my face across our great nation, but this year galldarnit I guess I'll have to watch from my One Notion Sara's Ark Bus, unless I decide to rogue again, and crash the Good Ole Party there to get a word in edgeways the way I do on the Fox programs with Greta van Hannity and Sean who always reserve a space for me unlike the powders that be runnin the convention show this time who have taken my ego and thrown it under my big bus (LoutLOL) but at least in the proud traditions of the great forefathers I can get a big sense of humor about bein left out in the swamp this time around to make room for the keynote speaker who admittedly does have a wider base than I do, or so it seems, for the reinforced stage of messages that we want to hoist up there and support him on which of course I always will remain with my loyalties and so forth.

I’m Just A Half-Term Governor Who Can’t Say No Just In Time For Once In My Life So Please Release Me And I Am Tellin You I’m Not Runnin … And So Forth

Goshdarnit, it’s about doggone time I finally did decide to not finally run at last for that grand and not profitable enough high office of the President of the United States throughout this great nation of ours, for once not followin in the forefathers’ feet after so many hours of thinkin and prayin and wishin and hopin with my handlers and also too my family, so youbetcha I now boldly continue on in my rougey style then with my activities of bus ridin on my One Notion tour family extravaganza and roadshow spectacular whimsy ride-a-long book and personal appearance speech makin candidate endorsin televised opinionatin talkabout vocal expedition excursions, just as my spectacular rise was when I was goin there with Jomcain the Mavrik on those GOP stages and debatable events that brought me to the shiny world of gotcha journalism and lamestream media victimry that I have become known for across our great land that we must take back from where it was taken away from durin those times generally around the general election, so there will be so much more of me to hear and witness and be paid attention to since my timetable will now be taken up by these things I have been doin so far plus minus the makin up my mind part about runnin for President now so that will be one less active participation I will be able to be doin now as I continue on, still preachin the gospel about takin our country back from where it was shipped overseas to which I’m guessin is some foreign un-American hostile country once Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama got all in office there, and took it down that road that he’s goin down, spendin all our hard half-earned moneys plus wages and whatnots like a kid in a candy store with lots of money to be able to spend on candy there in the candy store with our candy money not his (and probably those exotic kinds of toffees and confructonaries that the real Americans can’t digest, namably those spicy Red-Hots with the little devil heads on the box which is fiendishly shockin and Anti-American if you were to ask me or even if you weren’t gonna ask me because I’d answer anyway because I seem to do that kind of thing across this great nation wherever I can set up a podium or a step-stool and a Mr. Microphone or karaoke set if an amplifier is not available which sometimes they are not, dependin upon the places where we go and cannot plug things into an available outlet) which does happen so many times across this great land of our forefathers whose footprints I will not stand on this time when I go from here to there to those places and meet the people at the events and malls where they ask me questions and I respond to them just so long as they fit into my prepared spontaneous answer grids and find-a-words that the folks workin like the devil (just like on those candy boxes are) always sketchin out replies and reactions for me to act upon and winkabout, and then havin me sit and at least try to memorize f’cryin out loud or at least read the answer off of my hand sometimes to those very questions printed out there which comes in handy when I run out of room up my head to hold onto all the words and complete sentences there for me to form so that the people will be able to gardner my knowledge from my vocal understandings, however, they will now be sadly depraved of my high and mighty replies of mine that I would be able to give out like candy from the office of the President but not now anymore youbetcha since I decided that I wouldn’t be seekin that President job which I could see myself so easily doin there better than Obaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaama, followin in the footsteps of Governor Christie there I guess, even though he has mighty big shoes to fill but I did it anyway right after him when he said just the other day that he would not be stampin into the race at this late date, and also too those pointy things about leavin a job as Governor before your term is overwith to be “not good” even with the support of those real American that I talked about before that will be so unfortunately cut off from me and my talk-rope wordstrings because now I have finally decided to do so and say no and so forth finally to the question of whether or not I would be runnin for President which of course you have probably been able to figure out by now that the answer is “no I shall not” for me to be able to decide to say yes which was held up in question until now when I made it official.

In My Own Little Corner ... And So Forth

Doggonit, when Governor Christie was up there with all the lights and cameras and attention and microphones and attention and lights and attention and attention and folks askin questions with all the attention, I couldn’t help but feel a little ignored and whatnot since I have been goin through so many gymations and so forth as to whether I would be runnin for the President which was taken away from us back when I was appearin with Jomcain plus occasionally Joe the Plumber when all the lights and cameras and attention and microphones and attention and lights and attention and attention and folks askin questions with all the attention was on me back then durin the times across our great nation, so when he said that thing about walkin away from the office he’s held for 20 months there, it kind of brought me back to those whiskful times when I quit my job to achieve higher things for myself and my family on my big One Notion bus nowadays now, with my books and movies and appearances on those programs beggin for my opinions and snappy sayins which keep me in the spotlight with all the cameras and attention and microphones and attention and lights and attention and attention and folks askin questions there which a course is his decision to make but youbetcha I woulda picked out a different thing to do there if I ever do make up my mind goshdarnit to do so.