They'll Have None Of My Lipsticks At The Convention, Young Lady, Cause the GOP Told Me To Shut My GOB And So Forth ...

Doggonit, now that I have all this spare time on my hands since I won't be doin any speechtalkin at the conventions doggonit, I guess I'll put my full energies and staffs onto my next new book which is tentacally titled:  "PALINDRONES - Readin History Backwards And At The Same Time Speakin Them Forwards" - which will be published by way of the tweet, released and exhaled over several hundred thousand volumes, or maybe a million maybe, since we have only a valuable amount of limited characters available to thumb-in, and plus the shorter attention spans throughout this great country that we are affected with are different from before, so to get the words on out there to the Real Americans within the sound of my screen is so dearly important for the future historical benefits and also in memory of our proud, brave and dead forefathers who put their histories down on wrinkly paper durin the revolutionary days by candleflame, so that we could follow in their footsteps up over here, which is why I do it (although I use a bus, "Sarah's Ark, The One Notion Truth Machine" to drive-thru those patriotisms and values and so I don't actually walk in those Paul-Revered foot and hoofprints but drive over them) so maybe in time for the November convention holidays I'll be done with it, which would make a great and wonderful gift item across this wonderous bountyland, so dingdangit, it's back to the darwin board for me, since my expandin base and I were face-slappinly not invited to fill one of the talktime slots at the grand ole convention, so back goes all my new Grand Ole Party clothes, with all the stunned tags and shocked accessories also, plus those cedar balls that I was so noticed for and styled up in, back when Senator Mavrik, pardon me, Jomcain McCain, and I gripped the attention spans of the great planes of amberly wavable grains, with Joe the Plumber for comical reliefs durin the breaks, so he patriotically shares some of our blame too youbetcha, and now, as horrible and predictable (of course) as I spectulated, many of the lamestream media gangs are gonna have a feel-day with this nationally tragic news of my shut-out -- nay, my shun across my nation -- with little Miss Ask-It-All, Katie Couric, princess queen of the lamestream ball, gloatin by on a big giant media gloatfloat with sparklers and tiaras, up at the head of that parade wearin radical gotchahair ribbons that I have no desirable desire to march in, so instead I'm gonna follow the footsteps of our foundin fathers, just as I have been doin for nearly 200 years dogonnit, and also too, to do whatever I can do to uphoist my patriotic and historically shapable values across this great country that I started doin right around the time after I quit my governor job halfway in.